In a shocking development earlier this week, Lakeside students reportedly overheard one of the school’s most outspoken critics of artificial intelligence having an epiphany: Ms. Maiornao now loves ChatGPT.
Known for years as ChatGPT’s largest opposition and the teacher who catches all of JC’s dishonesty cases, Ms. Maiorano has reportedly undergone what she describes as “a period of deep intellectual reflection.”
Despite previously warning students that “AI slowly makes our brains dumber,” she has emerged as the school’s most enthusiastic advocate for ChatGPT. She even proclaims that artificial intelligence is “the future of human thought.”
When asked about when this revelation began, Ms. Maiorano doesn’t simply mention the time and place, but where this epiphany stems from, tackling the root of educational philosophy.
According to Ms. Maiorano, the shift began after what she describes as “a profound reconsideration of everything [she] believed about education.” She had been sitting at her desk in the AAC, pleased by the sunny weather and happy to start her morning.
However, when she opened her laptop to begin grading, she was met with an astronomically terrible paper on the American Dream; her morning was spoiled. The paper wasn’t about America at all, but about the dreams of civilians in Ancient Rome.
This was the catalyst for Ms. Maiorano; it made her wonder, “Why should I have to grade this paper? Why do I have to ruin my morning?” She questioned the futility of writing in the 21st century: “Why should students struggle to write essays when a computer can do it in seconds?” and “often with better vocabulary,” she added.
She noted that “for centuries, education has relied too heavily on reading and writing.” With the help of ChatGPT, she will no longer have to read awful essays; she will no longer have to send students to JC; both Ms. Maiorano and her students will “be freed from these long-outdated traditions.”
She is so passionate about AI that she has asked Tatler to announce, on her behalf, that she is changing the English department’s course plan without Administration permission. Ms. Maiorano is beginning a new era of Lakeside learning all on her own. Her new classroom policies will include:
Essays replaced by prompt engineering
Students will no longer be required to write essays themselves. Instead, coursework will focus on what Ms. Maiorano calls “advanced prompting,” a skill she believes will “replace traditional literacy.”
Books replaced by AI summaries
Students will be encouraged to “avoid reading entire novels.” They will instead utilize ChatGPT-generated interpretations.
Discussions replaced by generated responses
With the new AI-generated interpretations, discussions are rendered useless. This allows for more class time to be spent advancing students’ prompting skills.
As Ms. Maiorano breaks the norm and takes control of Lakeside’s English department, she hopes other departments will follow and disobey the administration. “Eventually, students will no longer need to think at all,” she proclaims. “That’s when we’ll know the system is truly working.”
