A few topics seem to be ones on which nearly every Lakesider has a passionate take: the lines in the WCC, the quality of their outdoor trip group, and — most importantly — their bathroom of choice. I’m here to tell you exactly what your opinion on that age-old question says about your aesthetic. If you don’t feel that your personal style lines up with your assigned one based on which bathroom you prefer, well, I suggest you get on Pinterest and start working on that, because I stand by my pairings.
The Moore bathrooms: Coquette All the Moore bathrooms are missing are some lace bows on the handle of each stall door — well, one bow. Though everyone either loves it or hates it, I’m a strong believer in Moore’s vintage charm, and the bathrooms are nothing if not coquette. They have an air of mystery and allure, leading you to ask questions like, “Who put that lemongrass toilet spray on the windowsill, and why has it been there since at least my freshman year?” (Hint: you’ll never know.) Those who prefer these bathrooms probably have a penchant for thrifting and necklaces with oversized heart pendants.
The Pigott bathrooms: Frazzled English Woman Aesthetic Located just outside of the beloved Tatler room and photography studio, past an array of stunning sculptures that require you to be very aware of where your backpack is swinging, the Pigott bathrooms are for Lakeside’s creatives. They also are kind of the worst; you can’t open the stall doors without awkwardly scooting yourself through. That “who can be bothered?” energy is captured in the frazzled English woman aesthetic, which can only be described as wearing literally whatever you want with little to no regard for whether it goes together. If this is your go-to bathroom and aesthetic, you’re artsy, fun to be around, and apparently have mastered some stall-exiting technique.
The upper Bliss bathrooms: Coastal Granddaughter Aesthetic It’s official: from my completely unbiased perspective, if this is your favorite bathroom, you are a hot girl (in the gender-neutral sense). When the sun shines through the windows on an unseasonably nice day, there’s really no contest against this bathroom. Is it an overstatement to call a bathroom gorgeous? Well, what we can call it is coastal granddaughter. Just picture the blue and white, the simple yet elegant tiles, and the ceiling-height windows. All these features make the Bliss upper floor bathrooms give off that effortlessly cool, charmingly quaint, and Pinterest-approved vibes, as do those who prefer them.
The WCC bathrooms: Gorpcore A newer aesthetic (at least on Instagram Reels… I’m about two months behind the trends, so forgive me if it’s old news), gorpcore is basically the PNW-fication of Tiktok aesthetics. It’s named for iconic trail snack GORP — Good Old Raisins and Peanuts — and embodied in puffer jackets and other REI-sourced attire. You dress like you’re going hiking but probably don’t leave downtown more than once a week. The WCC bathrooms, with their nearly brutalist design and the pervasive tang of whatever lunch was that day, embody the aesthetic’s essence. Plus, somehow, there always seems to be water all over the sink area; maybe that just makes it a little more like being in nature.
The lower St. Nicks bathrooms: Downtown Girl Aesthetic Though the downtown girl aesthetic is defined by pops of red, the orange of the lower St. Nicks’ bathroom stalls will also do. With this bathroom, it’s less about the interior and more about what’s around it, what brought you there in the first place. Likely, that’s the droffice, which gives off an incontestable cool city girl energy with its hundreds of signatures and its couches you don’t want to look under the cushions of. But inside the bathroom, there’s a faded drawing on the wall and, during production weeks, a drama student getting in or out of costume. And for some reason, only the girls’ bathroom has a sink inside. That’s the kind of chaotic feminism the downtown girl lives for.
The lower Allen Gates bathrooms: Indie Sleaze There is something diabolical about this bathroom. It’s in the singular always-open locker holding random cleaning supplies in the corner, the three sophomore girls blocking the door and crowding the only mirror to reapply their mascara, the experience of glancing up and seeing a spider and several dozen of its eggs right next to the smoke detector. If this is your favorite bathroom, you’re a little intense, but know how to let loose and have a good time… come to think of it, a fitting description of STEM-oriented Lakesiders. This bathroom is chaotic and unapologetic — and isn’t that the essence of “Brat” and the indie sleaze revival? To quote Charli XCX: “She’s kind of ****** up, but she’s still in vogue.”
