If you’re looking for an athletic yet romantic Valentine’s Day this February, look no further. It’s time to get into the three most romantic sports!

(Disclaimer: The author is not responsible for any disappointment or failure associated with the advice given. Additionally, please forgive her utter lack of sports knowledge. Hopefully, she’s well enough versed in romance to make up for it.)

1. Golf
You might not expect it, but golf is where many passionate romances bloom. One person holding the other’s club and showing them how to swing… The endless American Dream-esque rolling hills and puffy clouds… Polo shirts and baseball caps. Just kidding. That’s not why golf is romantic. It’s because if you’re playing with your crush, you’ll be spending an absurd amount of time with them. Given that it takes nearly two hours to play through an 18-hole, two-person game, then gee, you’ll be getting all the alone time you could ever want. It’s the perfect opportunity for a long, long, long, long, long, long, long date. I hope you’re comfortable with a small pause in chit-chat as you line up your club to swing, then as your partner makes for an awkward cough, you completely miss the shot and have to start all over again. Tip: Wear sunscreen. Though a temporary blush across your skin is cute, skin cancer is not.

2. Beach volleyball
Make sure you wear your short-shorts, cuz it’s gonna get pretty hot out here! The perfect summer activity, beach volleyball is what all the cool teenagers want to do before summer’s end. This casual evening sport, usually accompanied by several cans of, um, soda and a beach bonfire, sets the mood for an utterly romantic evening by the water. After your sandy-haired soulmate spots you standing on the sidelines (or playing on the opposing team — enemies to lovers!), they’ll lose focus and get hit in the face by a volleyball. Then comes the perfect opportunity to nurse their wounds as they look at you reverently. The rest is history. Tip: Go barefoot. It’s better for running in the sand while holding hands, and also your flip-flops won’t get all gross and sandy.

3. Ice hockey
Gloves and hats are already adorable. Now with slick moves across the ice and shoulder pads!? It’s almost too much to bear. I’m totally not going to turn this into a book recommendation, but if you’re a romantic-graphic-novel fan, read “Check, Please!” by Ngozi Ukazu; it perfectly captures the essence of ice hockey courtship. You can, again, watch safely from the bleachers — but unlike beach volleyball, you won’t be getting periodically sprayed with sand. You’ll just be frequently shoved by overenthusiastic college hockey fans! And whether your Valentine is skating to the goal or cheering for your favorite team beside you, it’s the perfect setting for any romance. Tip: If your partner is an ice hockey player, watch out for their socks. It’s unknown how often they are washed, and you do NOT want to get near those things.

Let this article be your 100% trustworthy guide on how to score the perfect sportsy date for Valentine’s Day! And hey, remember there are totally romantic solo sports for a self-love date, too. If you’re feeling like you’re your own soulmate this February 14, don’t forget to dance, bowl, fish, run, or karate-kick your beautiful heart out! Happy Valentine’s Day, Lakeside.