Secret Admirer Letters

Compiled by Lorelei S. ’25

  • I had heard lakeside was full of, let’s say, people who were less than pleasing to look at, but since my first day I saw him I knew that rumor was false. From his Bieberish hair to his washboard abs, he is the most beautiful person I’ve ever laid eyes on. I’m in love with Arin Jaff.
  • To Mary Y: You’re so pretty and I love the sound of your voice. Your talent and pure genius amaze me. Your sociable, likeable and in the span of a few months at school you’ve been able to make so many friends. I’ve been into you for a while now. <3
  • I have the hugest crush on the freshman Kate Denney and I don’t know how to tell her so… Kate if you see this- I love you
  • hey sophie b… its me, ur secret admirer…….. are you a parking ticket? because you’ve got FINE written all over you……… mario carting off of that statement, do you like raisins? do you feel about a date? because if I could rearrange the alphabet, i’d put ‘u’ and ‘i’ together……  xoxox
  • Natalie B. (25) is the most beautiful girl in the whole wide world! The way she walks, the way she talks; being in her company is simply heaven! Oh how I wish she were mine!
  • Dear Welela, You’ve caught my attention. I love the way you laugh and the way you joke around with me. I try and compliment you, but I don’t know if you understand that I am trying to get your attention. I really like you.
  • i think i love welela solomon. she is so cute, hot and funny. she always listens to me and gives me the best advice, but i don’t know how to tell her that she makes me feel so safe. i am going to miss her so much when i graduate.
  • I’ve been interested in Welela for a while now. I compliment her all the time, but I think I might be too subtle about it. She’s so funny, and I always feel so much like myself around her. I hope through this she can put two and two together. 🙂
  • I would pay to be strangled by one of Hieu Tran’s meaty biceps.
  • hey *******, you’d never guess… but i really like you. i can recognize you out of a crowd of people, just by the energy you give and your voice. but again, you’ll never know all this.