Suggestions from a Sage Senior


I am (as hopefully you already know) a senior this year. I would normally tell you to identify me on campus by my ruggedly handsome looks, but since masks are a thing, my flip flops are another tell-tale sign. Considering my grade is the only one to have finished a full year of in person school, it’s not surprising that the chaos of a new quarter, new sports seasons, and, of course, winter ball, might have you a little overwhelmed. As a self-proclaimed life expert with a dry sense of humor, I’m aiming to help answer some of your questions, or at least make you chuckle.

HELP!! My friend just told me that her friend likes me. Like, is REALLY into me. And it’s weird because I’m friends with him, but I don’t want to give him the wrong impression. If I continue hanging out with him, will that make it harder for him to move on?

You shouldn’t have to avoid this boy just because of this situation. I’d wager he wouldn’t be too happy about suddenly getting ghosted IRL either. However, at some point you do have to make it clear to him how you feel (one way or another). It’s totally fine to take some time, keep hanging out with him, but once you make up your mind, let him know, so you aren’t “giving him the wrong impression.” You can 100% continue to be friends, but transparency will make it so that you are on the same page about your relationship.

How do I get my parents to recognize my independence/how can I build a healthy relationship with parents as we become young adults?

The first step is for you and your parents to understand where each other are coming from. All parents want to see their children succeed, and all want varying degrees of involvement in making that happen. Just telling your parents that you’re more independent and that you don’t need their help won’t fix anything. Instead, it will make them feel helpless, and they won’t know how to help you other than by nagging or trying to control your schedule. 

Here’s an example of unproductive dialogue:

“How was your day?”   


“What did you learn?”


Building a healthy relationship with your parents requires you being open and keeping them in the loop with what you’re doing/feeling.

My friends and I have a bet going about asking our crushes to the winter ball. I really want to ask the girl I like but I don’t want her to feel any pressure to say yes. However, my friends (in their well-meaning excitement and support) want to make a big deal out of it and for me to ask her in front of a lot of people. How should I handle this while being respectful of my friends and my potential date?

I see where your friends are coming from, but they need to take some chill pills. I know many people who hate being put on the spot (ie. being asked to a dance in front of a crowd), and I think it’s very smart of you to be respectful of that. Let your friends know – respectfully – that you are resolute in doing it your own way, and they can save their excitement for the actual dance and related festivities.

As a self-proclaimed life expert with a dry sense of humor, I’m aiming to help answer some of your questions, or at least make you chuckle.

I asked someone out (they said yes), but I don’t know how to plan an actual date help! I’m super busy these next few weeks but I really wanna see them 🙁

Firstly, to state the obvious, pick something you both enjoy (at least somewhat) for the date. Ideally something where it’s easy to socialize while doing it, but still engaging even if conversation is slow. That said, nervous and awkward moments are an inevitability—just know that they’re equally nervous, remember you’re super excited to spend time with each other, and embrace the moment!  As for we’re-both-super-busy-and-don’t-have-time-to-go-out dates, I have a few ideas: Netflix party (maybe watch an episode of a show together semi regularly), a culinary challenge over Zoom, or maybe just a homework session (sounds lame but at least you’re doing it with someone you like).

I can’t decide which spring sport to do, how do I decide?

Choose a sport that you’re interested in and think you will enjoy (duh). That said, it can be fun to try something new (even if you’re no good at it), especially if you get a couple friends to do it with you. If I might offer a completely unbiased opinion: track and field is lots of fun and has many events so there’s probably something you’d enjoy!

My best friend dated my ex and kept it a secret from me for months. I have forgiven her, but do I give her my trust?

I think you should let your best friend know how upset their secrecy made you, and if they seem genuinely regretful and reasonably determined to not repeat the experience, there can still be trust between you two. Otherwise, I think you need to cut them off like Michael Bluth did his family.

My close friend likes a guy that I don’t think is good enough for her, what do I do?

Ultimately, it’s up to her. You can offer your perspective, but at the end of the day her emotions are hers alone. It can be hard to stand by and watch your friend make poor decisions, but they should have the autonomy to make their own mistakes.

How do I make cookies that don’t taste gross?

I recommend checking out Sally’s Baking Addiction. Even I was able to figure it out, so I’m sure you can too!

I killed my girlfriend in a sword fight? What do I do now?

Confess. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯