He’s back, louder (but still shorter) than ever — the LEGENDARY Lorax has come to relive his glory days by facing his newest opponent: Lakeside. Panic has ensued throughout the student body and administration — is this the start of a rebellion? I ran around campus just to find the furry little creature struggling to reach the top row of mailboxes (it’s worth noting that he has the legacy, but definitely not the height). The minute we made eye contact he scurried away dropping a letter that was addressed to the…Tatler staff? 

To: the Tatler staff

From: the Lorax

I am the Lorax, and I speak for the trees — and what they’re saying is painful to see. You disturbed my slumber that lasted for decades on end, to horrify me by the amount of paper you shred? The posters, the math packets, oh me — oh my, surely there’s other methods to what you say is normalized? Posters in every hall and wall, surely they know that no one wants to see their slogan at all? No mean to be harsh, but it’s hard to be nice when my dear friends the trees are trembling with fright. Aside from the posters, what’s that I hear? — Math classes go through more papers in a year? It can’t be hard to find a solution to this at all, be like your students who conquer the problems you think aren’t hard! Don’t disappoint me, or else I fear I’ll come to wreck even more havoc on this school you hold dear.

…

You heard it here first! The amount of paper Lakeside uses reached the attention of THE LORAX – that’s a massive red flag if we’ve ever seen one. The minute the Lorax’s letter reached the mass Lakeside population, protests ensued on campus fighting for less paper usage. No one, especially us humans, wants anything to be fixed unless a magical being tells us to do so, and for that we thank the Lorax for rallying us together! After weeks of protests, Dr. Bynum instituted a new policy that featured iPads being given to each student to do their math homework on and TVs in every hallway for club advertising and student government to be advertised on — way to go! 

To commemorate the Lorax’s help, the Lakeside student body decided it would be best to create a cardboard cutout of the Lorax and place it next to the forest of trees behind the chapel so he can be honored for the way he served his trees. Did we possibly anger him? Maybe, but we can still say way to go us!