Whether we use them for power naps between classes, unexpectedly serious conversations with friends, or soothing a stomach ache from too many WCC chocolate mousses, Lakeside’s couches are of use to students day in and day out. However, they are dreadfully underappreciated. Neglected. Taken for granted, even. It’s high time we reward their unwavering service. After all, these twenty-ish sofas are (literally) supporting students in need. This month, I went around the school, painstakingly testing each and every couch. Here are my definitive, indisputable findings.

Best for sleeping: the droffice trio

In the heart of the rarely explored and little-known caverns of St. Nick’s, three well-loved couches await those brave enough to venture into the realm of the theater kids. The two in the main room are often occupied, especially during lunches, but the thrill of finding the drama office empty is incomparable. With blankets, pillows, creepy masks adorning the walls, and the unspoken rule of never waking people up – please, just let us sleep – it’s the perfect spot for a nap.

Most comfortable: the downstairs AAC cluster

It seems that most athletes naturally prefer to spend their free time in the AAC, but aren’t looking to use the same upstairs couches as the always-messy freshmen class. Thus, they gravitate towards the group of well-padded sofas and armchairs on the lower level, and who can blame them? They have a great view of a brick wall (okay, the brick wall, but it’s funnier put the other way) and are shielded from natural light. Though these couches are usually already taken by threatening upperclassmen who could undoubtedly defend their spot if needed, they should definitely be claimed if those athletes don’t already have dibs.

Best vibes: that one couch in the Moore corner classroom

It’s hot take time. In my opinion, Moore’s charm outweighs how decrepit it is and the absolute awfulness of its bathrooms. Yes, it’s drafty in the fall and too hot in the spring, but it’s quaint. Its couches are just the same. There’s something about that one lonesome sofa on the second floor in the northmost classroom that is just wonderful. She’s different. She’s not like other couches. When you’re looking to mix up your couch-lounging experience, head to Moore.

Most stylish: the Bocouchzi

Mr. Boccuzzi’s Bliss office is lovely even without its centerpiece. It features student art and a view overlooking the entrance to Fix Hall and that awkward south part of the field, but most importantly, there are two leather chairs and a turquoise couch. The hue is strikingly similar to the blue-green we all wanted our bedrooms to be in the 2010s. The pillows-per-square-foot in that room may be a little high, but let’s chalk that up to flawed design choices, not a fault of the couch itself. Overall, the sofa is a statement, and that statement is, “I know how to design an office.” Well done, Mr. Boccuzzi.